


Breathe

by lunestar



Category: NieR: Automata (Video Game)
Genre: Fluff stuffed with angst, M/M, pretty much everyone from the play shows up in this fic or is at least mentioned, vague spoilers for the stage play
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-03
Updated: 2018-04-03
Packaged: 2019-04-17 22:50:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,855
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14199354
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lunestar/pseuds/lunestar
Summary: After a long day and bit of tension concerning a certain topic within the squad, No.2 and No.9 decide to rest and chat while enjoying each other’s company. What was supposed to be a relaxing time turns out to be more than either one of them expected.





	Breathe

**Author's Note:**

> Welp first M29/M92 I’m actually uploading. I do have another thing with them which is technically the first oneshot I started that’s in No.2’s pov, but I’m debating on if I want to keep that or scrap it for a multichap thing. 
> 
> Now for warnings. Some vague spoilers for the boys stage play, but I recommend you watch it before reading this just to be safe. And if you haven’t watched it, you should because it is very very good. Spectacular! 100/10. Would happily watch again as the emotional freight train rams my body into the sun and incinerates me. This fic gets a bit heavy at one point, but nothing explicit. I feel this is a hard T rating if anything, but I’ll keep the current rating the way it is to be on the safe side.
> 
> Another note to make is that when No.2 and No.9 are alone together, I have them call each other by their names as they are said in the play in Japanese. No.2 = Nigou | No.9 = Kyuugou (I believe I have the correct spelling from what I researched but feel free to correct me if I’m wrong). This is basically their way of giving the other an affectionate nickname. I hope it’s not too distracting but if it is, I completely understand if you want to back out. This is not beta read like my other fics, so any pesky mistakes I missed, I hope they’re not too distracting either. 
> 
> Sorry for the long note. I’m going to shut up now. Hope you enjoy!

Cactus is wildly gesturing here and there as he tells another one of his stories with so much enthusiasm, No.9 can’t help but be drawn into it as always. The current war story session—a name that the rest of the squad had unanimously decided to call them, is going on. This time however, the Resistance captain has both Phlox and Lotus taking the roles of two machine lifeforms he fought in a forest, claiming they were rather unique in how they acted. While Phlox appeared reluctant despite agreeing to it with a smile, Lotus jumped up and down, only for the former to mutter something about _he’s_ supposed to stay still. Intentional or not, everyone in  the camp— besides No.6 who looked bored out of his mind, expressed their amusement. Even the Instructor at one point tuned in, leaning against one of the columns for a brief time before going about his business and returning back to his room no doubt. Even if he’s persistent to show it with how professional and strict he is, there was clearly a smile on his face.

Having moments like these after a long day is both well needed and relaxing for _all_ of them. In fact, it’s become a sort of routine of sorts to sit around together to wind down. Sometimes, it’s not even listening to war stories but engaging in casual conversation. But hearing the different war stories from Cactus in particular with how he managed to defeat machines in such dire situations, is absolutely amazing _and_ heroic!

While No.9 is engrossed into the next phase of the story, particularly one where Cactus is talking about having to use machines as stepping stones to cross a lake filled with oil, he hears shifting beside him. Looking over to his left, he sees No.2 who seems strange for a lack of a better term. It’s hard to tell considering he’s the only one not wearing his visor, but with his posture and the way his mouth is set, he seems so disinterested. It normally isn’t like him. True not _everyone_ laughs, interjects in awe, or express their obvious skepticism with Cactus’ stories, but today No.2 seems so out of it. He’s also picked up a habit recently where he glances at his wrist a lot. For what that reason is, he isn’t sure exactly, but he wants to say it has to do with his injury bothering him again.

And every time he silently watches him, No.2 would turn his head in his direction with a smile before returning it back to Cactus. It seems forced in his opinion, and he’s tempted to ask him if they can excuse themselves together so he can check on him again just be on the safe side. He did perform his repairs earlier today along with everyone else’s, but it would give him a _much_ calmer state of mind if he did No.2’s again. Unfortunately when it comes to repairs, No.2 can be so stubborn about them. Even if he teases the other android about the fact he finds himself healing him more compared to No.3-- and how _his_ reckless behavior on the field tends to be, he does work on him a lot. With all things considered and even if No.2 is a Defender type, he _hates_ the idea of him getting hurt.

No.2 looks at him again, and No.9 doesn’t need to see his eyes to know he caught him in the act  _again_. As always however, the other android stays silent with a nod of his head paired with a forced smile before they both return it back to the Resistance captain.

“--And _right_ as I was about to jump to safety to reach the other end,” Cactus says all the while slowly dragging his hands in the air before shooting them up above his head. “This _massive_ machine, towering _humongous_ metal body, _shot_ out of the oil with me on top of it and--”

A chorus of beeps via the notification from SS is heard, and No.9 thinks the source is coming from his own with how everyone grows silent and looks over in his direction. His eyes lower to his wrist where his device is located but as soon as he did, No.2 stands up with his mouth set into something resembling a scowl. He bows to everyone and apologizes for interrupting as he excuses himself soon after.

No.9 can’t help but watch his retreating back and notice that right before he’s out of sight, No.2’s pace had quickened. Was he expecting a call from someone? That would explain why he seemed so fixated on looking down so much earlier. On the other hand, it is possible the Instructor wanted him— even if it is strange he contacted him via SS when he was standing around here earlier. The longer he reflects, the more it made perfect justifiable sense. With how busy the Instructor is, especially nowadays, that could be the reason why he contacted No.2 that way.

The longer No.9 ponders on his inner musings, the more it seemed to soothe most of his worries as he returns his attention back to Cactus.

Unfortunately, just like how No.2 was fixated with looking down so much, he can’t help but keep glancing back at the empty spot now by his side.

* * *

 

When the story came to an end, there’s a bit of the usual commotion that came from Lotus as he gleefully announces he can’t wait to go over some kind of new plan of his, with Phlox interjecting he hopes it isn’t too dangerous. Cactus’ response is a hearty laugh followed by clasping both his hands on their shoulders with a huge grin. Before all three of the Resistance members make their leave, Cactus tells everyone to get enough rest for tomorrow. All of them agree but the scene a moment before, made No.9 smile. Even if things seem incredibly bleak and hopeless with how operations tend to be for the squad, maybe one day in the future everyone in YoRHa can have lighthearted moments like that.

Small talk begins between the squad members as always, but he can’t find himself focusing on any of it like he would normally do. Instead, No.9 turns his head at the empty space beside him.

No.2 should have been back by now. What could be taking him so long?

The chattering quiets down for some reason, and when No.9 returns his attention back to everyone to find out why, he sees No.3 craning his neck all the while looking over his shoulder and cupping his hand near his mouth. His expression is so serious, that it’s a bit unsettling considering the type of person he is.

“Don’t you think he’s kinda… I dunno _shady_?”

There’s an exchange of puzzled looks with everyone except for No.6, who might as well be asleep at this point, and No.4 who seemed nothing short of annoyed. It isn’t anything new with him considering how he and No.3 are, but with No.6, he isn’t even sure. He’s been awfully quiet since the war story session began, and only perked up when the Instructor stopped by.

As the silence continues, considering they have _no_ idea who is being referred to as ‘shady’, No.3 reels his head back with a groan. “Give your senior a break! You don’t expect me to spell _everything_ out to you bunch, do ya? I mean…” He narrows his eyes again and lowers his voice to a whisper. “No.2. Do you guys feel like he’s shady or somethin’?”

No.2…  is shady? As in suspicious? What made No.3 think _that_ of all things?

There’s a heavy exhale of air, and the owner of it is No.4 who is already rolling his eyes. “No.3, keep idiotic ramblings to yourself. No one needs to listen to gossip _especially_ coming from an idiot like you.”

“ _Oi, you bastard!_ I didn’t ask your smartass for an answer since you ‘ve got _no_ clue how to read the air!”  After barking those words out, he grins the second he returns his attention to everyone else. “So what do you think? I mean, can’t any of _you_ bunch read the vibes in the atmosphere about the guy?”

Upon the quiet exchange of glances at each other yet again, No.21 taps his fingers against the edge of his seat as his gaze travels to nowhere in particular. “I suppose feeling that way is justified.” He murmurs out. “He did join our squad late.”

“But No.2 was supposed to be here much earlier than us though.” No.22 softly adds before he blinks at the multiple pair of eyes zeroing in on him in an instant. He shifts a bit closer to No.21 as he stares at his lap. “W-With our seniors I mean!”

“…You really do stutter a lot when everyone stares at ya, huh?” As No.22’s face turns even redder as he begin to splutter out a string of sounds no one can understand, No.21 takes no time sending their senior a glare which No.3 shrugs off. “ _Damn_. Okay then. But I guess that’s a good point too, but I’m leaning on what No.21 said. No.2’s so damn quiet to boot, so it’s hard to get a good read on him.” His gaze shifts to No.9 all of a sudden and said android can’t help but feel a bit apprehensive about what he no doubt was about to be asked. “What about you, No.9? You probably have better vibes on the guy more than the rest of us.”

That doesn’t necessarily mean that’s fair to say that warrants suspicion. “Even if No.2 joined our squad late, he has been with us for a while now.” No.9 explains. “And not everyone has to be vocal every day.”

There’s a distinct giggle the second he answers that, and for the first time since their little discussion began, No.6 seems to have come back to life and is _clearly_ interested at the current topic with how lax his posture is.

“Oooh _someone’s_ getting irritated, huh?” He singsongs out as his lips curl into a smile. “It’s such a good look on you, No.9.”

It dawns on him that he _is_  getting affected by this considering he feels the tension in his body for the first time. Maybe he feels a _little_ bothered too, but saying he’s irritated as No.6 is accusing him of, is stretching it in his opinion. He just doesn’t like the idea of No.2 being wrongfully accused of something he isn’t.

“I’m not getting irritated. I just don’t think it’s fair to say he’s shady just because he keeps to himself.” Pausing to look everyone else, he continues. “No.2 protects _all_ of us. How can that make him suspicious? If anything, accusing him of being up to no good is rude. We are a team after all, so we should all get along and trust one another.”

The other android scoffs. “Stiiiill, he seems _very_ keen on keeping an eye on _you_ in particular. I wonder why--”

“The Instructor orders who we tend to be around during operations, No.6.” No.4 firmly cuts in all of a sudden. “No.9’s safety is vital during those times considering he keeps _all_ of us alive in case anything happens to us.”

No.6 clicks his tongue. “Aww, _boo_. I obviously know _that!_ ” He begins to hum as he fiddles with the lapels of his coat. “Everyone else still at least _tries_ to chat with the rest of the squad. No.2 stays tight lipped so much, that collar of his might as well cover his whole head.”

No.9 feels a prickling sensation at the comment. “No.2 is actually really nice once you get to know him, No.6.”

“You’re just being biased because he has no problem saying more than a few words to _you_.” His brows rise as his mouth parts before a grin splits on his face causing the other to grimace. “Saaay, No.9? We shouldn’t be suspicious of _you_ either, right? The two of you seem to be spending a _lot_ of time together alone when I think about it.”

His eyes widen only for them to narrow a second later. Normally, he tries his best to stay calm and collected during times when he feels upset, but No.6 is beginning to thin his patience. Whatever business they do is _nothing_ that warrants suspicion in the way he or anyone else unfortunately believes. This is childish even for someone like No.6 at this point.

“ _Excuse me?_ ”

While everyone else is taken aback from the sharp tone he adopted, No.6 appears absolutely thrilled by it. So much in fact, that during his laughing fit, his body is shivering as he clutches his sides. Once he calms down, he leans back in his seat. “Aww, don’t play dumb, No.9. I know you heard me. Unless you’re asking No.2 to train you privately or something.” No.6 turns his head as he side eyes him. “You could use it with how we do all the work on the field while you get to stand back all safe and sound. Lucky lucky you, huh?”

No.6's words made his breath hitch as he lowers his gaze to his lap. It… it isn’t a lie. He is always the one who stands on the sidelines while everyone gets hurt and dies time and time again. The one who has to be protected constantly and _could_ fight, but is too _afraid_ to. And in the rare instances he has to engage the enemy, he trembles. But even if he is a coward, he _isn’t_ useless. He may not be skilled in combat, but he can’t afford to fight on the field and be reckless. Not when so many others count on him to do his job and bring them back if anything dire happens.

Regardless of No.6’s opinion on his role during operations, he can say all he wants--

“Or, _maybe_ the two of you are doing a _different_ kind of training. If you are, I’m sure No.2 isn’t _that_ tight lipped unless that’s in a whole _different_ way all together too--”

And No.9's earlier reasoning and resolve to _not_ react, shatters in an _instant_  right then and there, as he jerks his head up. His narrows so much, he can practically _feel_ the tension between his brows as his mouth grounds out his next words.

“Shut. **_Up_**.”

The tone of his voice was almost like venom and not only did it surprise every single member of the squad, but him as well. He quickly averts his gaze as his head lowers again. It isn’t something he would do, and he’s already feeling guilty for it even though a part of him believes he shouldn’t be. It isn’t any of No.6’s business what he and No.2 do when they’re alone, and he doesn’t need to talk about No.2 that way either.

While silence and tension hangs heavy in the air, he sees No.22 from the corner of his eye looking at him in concern with his mouth parted open and his hand reaching out only for it to fall back.

“Hey, we should just drop this subject. What about something positive?  As in something interesting we may have seen today? I saw a bird near a little nest and it was singing and--”

“Who cares about a dumb bird that’s gonna bite the dust soon?” No.6 shrugs a hand in the air. “ _Booooring!_ I’d _much_ rather hear whatever else No.9 wants to say to me.”

And he makes sure to keep his tone even despite the fact he is very _close_ to lashing out again along with it leading him to stand up. “I prefer keeping my comments to myself if they aren’t polite.”

“ _Aww_ ,” No.6 coos. “I really _did_ hit a nonexistent nerve with you! Too bad No.2 isn’t here. I would _love_ to see his face right--”

No.4 clears his throat. “No.6, it might be in your best interest if you stop accusing your fellow squad members of accusations _and_ testing their patience.”

“No.9, knows I was just teasing him!” His eyes lock on to his as the playful yet sharp glint remains as he tilts his head to the side. “No hard feelings, right?”

He says that all the time to everybody, but even if he isn’t too happy with what happened earlier, he doesn’t trust himself to answer that question civilly. Instead he looks away and nods, and tries not to grimace when hearing the other giggle again.

“ _Damn_. I’m glad for _that_.” No.3 says all of a sudden as he heaves out a sigh. “For a second there, I thought I might have to pull No.9 off of ya.”

“It was all in good fun~!” Placing a finger on his cheek, his gaze lifts before he settles it on No.4 who is already grimacing. “I think I need to make No.4 my next victim though, you’re about as stiff as Black and _need_ some fun in your life.”

Said senior’s eyes widen but only for a bit as he looks away. “I am _not_ stiff--”

“ _Holy shit!_ ” No.3 roars as he slaps a hand on his knee before elbowing his side with a grin which No.4 returns with a flat look as he crosses his arms. “He’s fucking right you are! You’re so goddamn stiff, I could swing you around as my new sword-- _!_ ”

No.4 knocks his makeshift seat out from under him with a swift kick in the blink of an eye causing the other android to yelp out a curse when he falls flat on his face. It’s barely noticeable but the corner of No.4’s mouth is lifted as he closes his eyes.

“ _That fucking hurt, **you ass**!_ ” When everyone begins to snicker, No 3 snaps his attention to them as they quiet down when he settles each and every one of them with a glare. “ ** _Oi!_** _Respect your senior when he could have cracked his head open!_ ”

“Considering it’s _your_ head, it would be a feat to do.”

“I am so _sick_ of your goddamn fucking _shit_ , No.4!” No.3 growls out as he grabs the hilt of his great sword. “You. Me. _Outisde_. **_Now_**.”

“No. No. And a _definite_ no.”

As No.3 picks himself up and starts barking at No.4 and the latter pulling up his hood as if it will block out the former's voice, light conversation begins again between everyone else. No.9 can’t help but heave out a sigh. He’s  _more_ than relieved by the fact there isn’t any more gossiping going on and things feel much more lighthearted now.

There’s a soft tap on his shoulder, and when looking up, he sees No.22 smiling with his gaze focused somewhere out in the distance. Following it, he holds back a gasp when seeing No.2 by one of the columns. No.9 quickly looks back at everyone while standing up and bowing before excusing himself. It doesn’t pass him one second No.6 is amused by his sudden departure especially when he zeroes in on No.2, but he ignores it. The _last_ thing he wants is to get upset again.

As he makes his way towards No.2 so they’re right across from the other, the other android stays quiet as he stares at him before turning his head in the direction where everyone else is. His mouth thins for a few seconds before he returns his attention to him and it shifts into a small smile.

“I’m sorry if you were waiting on me.”

No.9 quickly shakes his head. “It’s okay. I figured it had to be some kind of emergency. Were you able to take care of it?”

No.2 winces for some reason much to his confusion. “Is it okay if we go someplace else?” The sudden surge of worry hits him in seconds, but as soon as he parts his mouth, No.2 shakes his head. “I want to spend time with you.” He looks away, and there’s a noticeable tint on his cheeks as his voice gets so soft, he barely hears the next the word. “ _Alone_.”

His chest warms and he can’t help but nod his head. “I’d like that. Is my room okay?”

He nods and as they make their way down the hall before crossing the corner, they shift around so that they’re side by side. It’s quiet between them both, and it’s hard to tell what No.2 is thinking with his visor on, but with the way his mouth is set, he seems as if he’s clearly bothered by something.

“No.9, what is it?”

His body jolts at the other’s voice all of a sudden, but he quickly shakes his head. “ _N-Nothing!_ ”

“You’ve been staring at me for a while now for it to be only ‘nothing’.”

His lips purse at the other’s voice. Even if it’s barely noticeable, he can hear the light teasing tone in it. “Are you giving me a hard time again?”

No.2 smiles. “Not exactly, but I do have something I would like to ask you.”

“Oh, what is it?” 

“All of you were talking about me earlier weren’t you?”

The smile on his face drops as he comes to a halt, and No.2 does the same. Guilt hits him in an instant along with the fact No.2 is more than aware of what his answer will be. “No.3 just asked something and well… it kind of got a bit out of hand.”

There’s a pause as No.2 tilts his head up before lowering it again. “I figured as much. Then again, I’m used to being the center topic of discussion for others.”

Anyone else would have heard that as a casual answer and believe No.2 could care less, but he can hear how bothered he is by it despite being stubborn. When No.2 turns away, No.9 reaches for his sleeve. He isn’t even looking at him right now either.

“You’re… upset.”

“I’m not.” He sighs out. And the reply was far too quick for his tastes. “I think I sound neutral about it if anything.”

“Which means it bothered you.” No.9’s head lowers as he frowns. “I probably didn’t help adding more fuel for it to keep going. I really shouldn’t have let what No.6 said bother me so--”

No.2 quickly faces him and there’s so much tension in his shoulders, his eyes widen. “What did he say to you?”

And No.2 doesn’t even _try_ to hide the fact he isn’t pleased by it. He’s even looking back in the direction from where they just came from as if he’s actually _thinking_ about confronting No.6 about this.

Why didn’t he just keep his mouth shut? He should have kept that to himself.

Drifting his previous grip from his sleeve to his hand, No.9 gives it a small tug forcing the other android to look at him again. “No.2, it’s okay. You and everyone else know how he is. He picks at people to get a reaction out of them.”

“Even if he does, he said something to you that clearly made you upset.”

“It’s only No.6, No.2.” No.9 assures softly. “That’s just how he is. And with me being the way I am, and not liking how the topic was heading, I was a susceptible target for him. I’m sorry, but even that aside, I don’t think the others are being hateful about the gossiping subject concerning you.”

“I never said anything about it being hateful.”

“But still…”

Silence fills the air between them as No.9’s head lowers,  but in his line of vision he sees No.2 step closer all of a sudden followed by a light pressure under his chin tilting his head back up.

“To tell you the truth, No.9, I really don’t care what the others think about me, but if someone upsets _you_ , then _that’s_ when I care. No one should be bothering you because the two of us are close.”

He’s not quite sure how to respond to that. “No.2, I… but … no one should be talking about _you_ like that either and--”

“ _And_ ,” No.2 drawls out. “It doesn’t matter if they talk about me. So please don’t look so sad for my sake, okay?” His mouth begins to curve a bit at his next words. “But thank you for standing up for me all the same.”

He stares at him for a few seconds longer before returning the gesture himself as he slowly reaches for his hand and leans towards him. No.2 doesn’t move, only shifts his head as if glancing around, and he can’t help but laugh at the fact he’s trying to be so careful.

“No.2…” His voice begins to trail as heat reaches his face. “It’s only the two of us here.”

He’s very tempted to close the rest of the distance himself. They haven’t had any time together nowadays with how busy he is checking up on everyone.

There’s a noticeable tint spread out  on No.2’s cheeks as his hand shakes, but he leans closer nonetheless as he does the same. As soon as they’re about to make contact, No.2 freezes and draws back all of a sudden. A pang of disappointment hits him even if No.2 had his reasons due to no doubt being paranoid of being—

“No.2 and No.9! We thought the two of you might have turned in already.”

No.9 forces the urge to not jolt at No.21 and No.22’s sudden presence, _or_ the voice from the latter. It’s always uncanny how No.2 has such good senses. He didn’t even _hear_ those two.

In an effort to not seem suspicious, No.9 clears his throat before gesturing over to No.2. “Um, we’re actually just having a conversation before we do that.”

While No.21 crosses his arms all the while arching a brow, No.22 turns to No.2 and his eyes fall on his wrist before he points at it. “Was everything fine?”

“…Fine?”

“You left and didn’t come back.” No 21 announces all of a sudden as his gaze drifts to him. “No.9 was worried about you.”

The fact the other android’s mouth curves a bit as soon as they locked gazes made him gawk. “ _No.21_!”

And No.22 is already grinning. “He _really_ was. Kept looking at your empty seat and everything.”

 _“Not you too!_ ”

Both of the twin models share a laugh together leaving him to stare at his boots. Right now, he’s _very_ envious of the fact No.2 can have the collar of his uniform hide the lower half of his face.

“We’re sorry if we…” No 21’s voice trails as he looks between them both and clears his throat. “ _Interrupted_ anything.”

“You didn’t. I was telling No.9 he needs to stop overworking himself.”

“Is that so?”

“It is.” No.2 turns his head towards him and continues. “Right, No.9?”

And he can’t help but gawk at the first casual reply he gave to to No.21. No.2 said it in such a convincing way even _he’s_ scrambling to remember if he did in fact tell him that earlier.

“Y-Yes! But it is my job to make sure all of you are okay. And you _especially_ have me busy.”

It dawns on him he shouldn’t have used those words at all. His face feels like it’s on fire and while both No.21 and No.22 are looking at him oddly, No.2’s mouth is barely curving into a smirk.

“I guess I do have you busy, No.9. I’m sorry.”

He’s doesn’t know what to say again and he wants to just stick his head in a hole of some sorts. Luckily, No.22 places a hand on his shoulder and beams at him being none the wiser about his and No.2’s _last_ exchange of words.

“That’s always like you to be so helpful and making sure to check up on everyone! But No.2’s right you know. You should take it easy. Plus, we have a big day tomorrow too.”

“Speaking of a big day,” No.21 begins. “ _All_ of us should do the same and get some rest. Not being at peak performance on the battlefield would cause issues and concerns for each and every one of us.”

“Right, right! We wouldn’t want to be dragging ourselves around when No.21 pinpoints the enemies’ location. Especially those last second scans!”

No.21 turns his head as he coughs into his hand as his cheeks begin to redden. “ _No.22_ …”

He laughs again which No.21 only sighs at with a shake of his head. “Either way, good night you two!” Shifting his gaze to No.2, he smiles. “Try not to overwork yourself either, okay? You’re a valuable member of the team, and we count on you too.”

No.2’s mouth parts all of a sudden and he doesn’t need to see the rest of his face to know he’s taken aback by the other’s words. What No.22 said is the truth, and he hopes No.2 can understand that.

When No.22 takes a step back once waving at them both, No.21 smiles and nods in No.9’s direction, but his lips press into a line when looking at No.2’s before they finally curve a bit when he says his good byes and leaves together with No.22.

It’s strange in a way. No.21 seems to always do that around No.2 as of late. Even when they were exchanging words earlier there was some tension coming from both sides. He’s tried asking No.21 about it, but he claims he acts no different with him like he did when he first joined. As serious and blunt of a person No.21 is, it still strikes him as odd.

Shifting his attention to No.2, the other android’s mouth is set in a thin line as he watches them leave, but as soon as they’re out of their line of sight, he turns his head and smiles.

“Let’s get going.”

No.2 reaches for his hand not a second later, and he’s taken aback by the fact he’s being so _bold_ about this. Considering he seemed so hesitant before, they both agreed on trying not to do anything that could warrant attention out in public. He doesn’t even want to think what the Instructor’s reaction could be concerning androids on the squad he’s leading are breaking protocol.

Relationships between soldiers are… prohibited in YoRHa after all along with many other things. Even so, he doesn’t regret one bit that his relationship with No.2 grew into what it is now. It made him happy, almost to the point he can forget about the war and forget about the fact they’re both members of YoRHa. With that thought alone, he squeezes No.2’s hand and smiles, only for it grow even bigger when the other squeezes back.

* * *

 

Once they reach his room, he’s a bit too hyper aware that No.2 is right behind him compared to before when they were walking together much earlier. He feels extremely giddy all of a sudden, to the point he can’t even get the door open and the light laughs behind him made his entire body heat up and cause him to fumble around even more.

 _Then_ his body decided to practically _flare_ when No.2’s breath begins to fan his ear as his hand rests on the middle of his back. A shiver travels up his body, and he thinks No.2 realizes it too when he inches closer so his mouth is now pressed against the shell of his ear.

“Do you need some help?”

It’s honestly _cheating_ what he’s doing right now and he wants to more than anything to just lean back into him.

Or glare at him even though it won’t work.

“N-No! I’m just… um--”

“ _Yes?”_ He presses on.

No.9 proceeds to glare holes into the door and tries his best not to groan. “ _Stop that!_ ”

He tries to sound stern but he fails at it miserably with how No.2 laughs again about the whole thing even more before pulling away. No.9 heaves out a sigh and once he succeeds in unlocking the door, he steps aside and gestures for No.2 to go in first, but made sure to keep his gaze locked on his boots. There is no doubt in his mind, the other android looks satisfied for the stunt he pulled not too long ago, and he doesn’t need to feel anymore flustered than he already is to see it with his own two eyes.

Once stepping inside, and locking the door behind him, arms wrap around his waist followed by a light pressure against his ear again.

“ _Kyuugou_.”

No.9 takes a deep breath as his chest clenches. No.2 sounded _so_ needy and it affects him in multiple ways that making a list would be nearly impossible to do when it’s combined with the fact he addressed him with his nickname.

_“Yes?”_

No.2’s  arms loosen around his waist, but his hands begin to drift to his sides, only to lightly drum his fingers against him as he swallows. There’s a pause, but No.2 slowly guides him around and pulls him closer.

“Was I giving you a hard time earlier?”

He very much was giving him a hard time with how he couldn’t concentrate as if his thought processors decided to stop working. He decides to play stubborn and look the other way, but when No.2’s bare hand reaches to cradle his face and the pad of his thumb brushes his skin, he takes in a sharp intake of air as he looks at him again.

It’s not even fair his own face is free from a visor but No.2’s isn’t.

Not even hesitating, No.9 reaches for the thin material, sliding it down until it’s resting around his neck. His blue eyes are dark and so intense with how they’re locked on to his as so many emotions swirl in them. It all made him feel so incredibly warm, protected, and wanted. He feels speechless like so many other times the more and more they hold each other's gazes. During moments like these, they gauged each other’s reactions to see who would make the first move. That giddy feeling from before consumes him at the anticipating thought of who would act first the longer they wait.

As soon as No.9 parts his mouth, No.2 begins to slide his hands agonizingly slow against his sides before dipping his head towards his neck. It’s only a brush, barely making contact as his lips ghost against his skin as well as the edge of his choker. His body squirms on reflex from the tingling sensation as his head lulls to the side, and he moves to rest his hands on No.2’s shoulders. The fact he’s teasing like this is the definition of foul play, but when No.2 _finally_ touches his skin directly, he surrenders.

“ _Nigou._ ”

He doesn’t know if calling him by that name was what spurred him to pull away first or the fact it seemed as if he wanted to do that from the very beginning, but he’d rather not think about it and focus on No.2’s mouth _finally_ meeting his own. His high collar gets in the way at one point, but he pulls it down enough so it didn’t become a hindrance. Their kiss is a release of pent up pure want and attention from them both. Even when they needed to pull away for air and took in the half lidded gazes being exchanged, they only met again with even more fervor. When No.2 nips at his lower lip, he parts his mouth and has to practically hold on to him for support with how he pressed closer to him as his tongue dived in and swirled against his own. They’re both harshly breathing from their noses, and he’s tangling the longer strands of hair at the nape of No.2’s neck between his fingers as he presses his tongue back.

Somewhere in that time frame, No.9 feels his back meeting the door. They’re so close, he can feel the rapid humming of their black boxes against their chests as their mouths continue to slide back and forth against each other. Everything seems as if it’s spinning, causing him to feel delirious, but he enjoys _every_ moment of it and welcomes the rush with open arms as he melts further into their kiss.

When they eventually pull away again, their ragged breaths fan the other’s face as they share a light laugh together. No.9 reaches out to brush the other android’s bangs out of his eyes with a smile.

“You acted as if you haven’t seen me in _days_.”

“I don’t think that’s fair for you to say when I can _easily_ say the same to you.” No.2 presses mouth against his forehead and lingers there before pulling away with a sigh. “But we haven’t seen each other like this for a while now, and I miss you.”

“I miss you too.” His hands drag to his chest as he begins to hum. “But you should give me another one for making me wait when I finished your repairs earlier today.”

No.2’s mouth curves. “And if I let you, you would have been late for the next person you had to see.”

That was very true. Neither one of them can help it when they start, and it tends to be difficult to not let anything escalate any further.

Either way, his body leans forward all the same as he grins. “But no one needs to be taken care of right now, right?”

“That’s awfully needy of you, Kyuugou.”

That’s not fair one bit for him to make that comment, and his inner thoughts about the subject must have reached his face considering No.2 is turning his head away to laugh.

“Not as needy as _you_ earlier. I half thought you weren’t going to wait outside.”

“I can be patient.” He leans in until his mouth is against his ear again. “You tend be somewhat loud when we’re together, and I enjoy hearing your voice when you get that way.”

No.9’s face feels like it’s on fire when No.2 pulls back with an innocent smile as if he _didn’t_ just say that. He used to be so shy when they first agreed to take the next step in their relationship and so was he to a certain extent, but No.2 has gotten much bolder the more time passed. Of course, he enjoys that from him as well, but that still isn’t fair to say!

“ _T-That’s_ \--”

“The honest truth.” No.2 moves in to peck his cheek and not one bit bothered by the glare being sent his way.

“Another honest truth is the fact _you_ can get loud too.”

His eyes widen as he averts his gaze. “I-I’m not--”

“Yes, you are.” This time he leans in and presses his mouth against the corner of his own. “And _that’s_ the honest truth.”

As No.2 heaves out a sigh, he looks back at him again. “…I guess I deserve that.”

“You did because you gave me a hard time.” No.9 sends him a half lidded look as he taps him on the chest.” _Again_.”

“Kyuugou, if you keep saying that, maybe I _will_ give you a hard time in an entirely _different_ kind of way.”

No.9 muffles a groan against his shoulder, and No.2 simply rubs his back with a laugh. Eventually they both pull away from each other, and walk to the foot of the bed to sit side by side. Once pulling off their gloves, or in No.2’s case his remaining one, they begin to do the same with their boots. It was during that time, a question from earlier shoves its way through the front of his mind.

“Nigou, do you mind if I ask you something?”

His hand stills, but he doesn’t lift his gaze away as he unzips his boots. “What is it?”

“Why is it that No.21 always seems to be so…”

“ _So?_ ” No.2 presses on.

No.9 pauses, fiddling with the elastic band of his socks for a bit before removing them, all the while trying to figure out what to say about a subject that he can’t help but feel is sensitive. “I’m not entirely sure what’s the best way to describe it, but just _tense_ around you nowadays?”

As soon as he removes his other boot, No.2 shrugs his shoulders before reaching his hands back to untie the visor still hanging around his neck. “You’re a lot closer to him than me, so you have a better chance of answering that yourself.” But his eyes do narrow all of a sudden as the tone of his voice grows firm. “Why? Did he say something to you too?”

He can’t help but grimace at the reaction he’s getting. “No, it’s just… since you don’t really talk much to the others, I get the feeling he leans more towards what No.3 said about--”

No.2 turns his head with a heavy sigh as he leans back against the palms of his hands. “I see you’re back on this gossiping topic again.”

No.9 winces at that. He honestly didn’t mean get back on that subject again. “I’m sorry. I know you don’t like it, but I do feel that maybe the gossip wouldn’t be a problem if they got to know you better.”

“…Does it bother you I don’t speak with the others more?”

He sounds worried and that’s the _last_ thing he meant when he made that suggestion, and his mouth starts moving before he even realizes it.

“N-No! You don’t have to be a chatterbox or anything! I mean look at No.4! He doesn’t talk much either, well at least outside of scolding and making comments about No.3, but _no one_ thinks the same about him! And he always means well even if he is _really_ serious! I mean, I used to think he gets annoyed when I huddle close behind him but he said he doesn’t mind it at all and--”

No.2 chuckles and his face begins to heat up even more. “Well, I know for a fact if I did speak more, I won’t ramble on like you do. Especially like just now.”

“I-I don’t ramble!”

“ _You do_.” He says all of a sudden as leans towards him. “Just like whenever you get nervous or flustered, you speak faster. And whenever you don’t do that, you look down a lot and stare at your feet.”

No.9 can’t help but gawk at him along with the fact he looks extremely satisfied about his observations. Is he _that_ easy to read? All of that _is_ technically true but…

“Did… did you try and change the subject just now?”

No.2 looks always all of a sudden as a coy smile spread on lips. “Not at all.”

His eyes narrow at the fact he’s teasing him again. “ _Nighou!_ ”

“ _Kyugou_.” No.2 singsongs out.

“You’re giving me--”

“A hard time?” He fills in before leaning back against the mattress as he stares at the ceiling. “But I do speak with the others outside of operations, even if it’s not much. No.3 actually wanted to spar with me earlier today. Unfortunately it wasn’t a good time for me. I… want to say it looked as if he was sulking before he stormed off.”

“No.3 probably was. He does that with No.4 a _lot_ whenever he’s too busy to spar with him too.” As No.9 stretches out on the bed himself with a happy sigh as he faces him. “But No.22 enjoys talking with you.”

“Really? I feel as if the bulk of our conversations are him asking me where _you_ are.”

No.9 reaches out and presses his finger into the other’s cheek. When No.2 looks at him, he smiles. “He means really well all the same. Just like earlier. No.22 can be shy at times, but he’s more open when around people he’s comfortable with. He likes you. Him asking you about me was probably his way of starting a conversation with you.”

“You have the advantage of knowing that about him along with all the others compared to me.”

It’s such a soft reply, he barely hears it. Reaching out towards him again, he forces No.2 to look his way. “Then… whenever the time feels right, try and talk with them. You’re too stubborn to admit it, but I think deep down you want to talk with everyone more.”

No.2 however looks both surprised and reluctant. “Kyuugou--”

“ _Nigou._ I’m not accepting any excuses from you _.”_ He makes sure his voice is firm enough but it does soften not a second later. _“_ Think of this as a good exercise for the good of the squad! Like team building.”

The other android sighs. “And what if I have tried? Then what? I don’t consider myself an outgoing person.”

“Then I give you an ‘A’ for effort in the fact you did try all the same. I can personally vouch that someone has to get to know you to see the real you.”

“The… real me.”

No.2’s voice is soft again for some reason, but No.9 reaches to poke his cheek which the other android easily intervenes with his palm as his lips twitch before forming into a smile. “The real you that teases, jokes, laughs, and smiles so much.”

No.2 shifts around to lie on his side to face him properly. “You said you were giving me an ‘A’ earlier, right? Are you going to give me something for trying with such good effort?”

“Hmm.” Tapping his finger on his cheek for a few seconds, he looks at him again. “I _could_ do that.”

“ _You should_.”

No.9 smirks immediately as the other arches a brow. “I guess so… you technically _are_ my senior.”

And No.2 takes no time physically showing he doesn’t like that. “Kyuugou, I told you to stop thinking that way. If anything you should be _my_ senior with how I joined this squad so late.”

He prefers not to. There have been times he’s slipped and answered him with ‘sir’ a few times much to the other’s annoyance, but playing around with No.2 is fun to do.

“Well in that case, as _your_ senior you should give me...”

“A kiss?” No.2 innocently fills in all of a sudden. “That’s demanding of you to ask of me.”

“And you call _me_ needy when you just asked for—wait… did you just _flirt_?”

“ _N-No_.” He blinks all of a sudden as he averts his gaze. “Requesting for something doesn’t count as flirting, Kyuugou.”

He can’t help but grin as he leans closer as No.2 leans back with a glare. “But you _did_ all the same.”

“ _I didn’t_ \--”

No.9 grabs his hands all of a sudden, taking the other android by surprise when pushing him down so he’s flat against the bed and grabbing his hands. Once pinning them above his head and straddling waist, he bows until his lips reach No.2’s ear. He’s more than aware of the fact they’re sensitive, and No.2 is already squirming when he lightly blows air against it.

Eventually, No.9 pulls away, enjoying how flustered he made him. “As your senior call me, ‘sir’.”

No.2 peers up at him in disbelief. “You’re joking, right?”

“It _is_ respectful to listen to your senior, remember?” He laughs all of a sudden before continuing. “Come on, just play along with me.”

Even though he stresses the last line out, No.2 is still grimacing even if he is trying his best to make the most convincing face to get him to agree. Unfortunately, the other android averts his gaze as more color blooms on his cheeks.

So stubborn.

Clearing his throat, No.9 leans in, his mouth nearing the other android’s ear again and once the sudden sharp intake of air is heard, he can’t but smile at the fact he’s already won with only two simple words.

“ _Nigou_ ,” No.9 breathes out in a low voice causing the other to shiver against him. “ _Please?”_

“ _Fine, fine_.” No.2 groans out, easily freeing his hands from his hold and pressing them against his chest so they can see each other properly. Clearing his throat, his voice softens. “I want my senior to kiss me. Is that okay to request from you…” He stops all of a sudden as he grins only to place a hand over his mouth as he begins to snicker. “ _Sir?_ ”

Despite the fact he wants to glare at him, No.2’s laughter is so contagious, he begins to do the same. “ _You ruined it!_ ” Moving to lay back against the mattress, he sighs. “You know, if we actually attended school like humans, you, No.3, and No.4 would be the seniors for the rest of us. _But_ ,” No.9 drawls out. “You would also be… the transfer student. I believe that’s the right terminology to use.”

“Because I joined late, right?” Folding his arms across his stomach he peers up above. “Humans have strange customs.”

“They do, but a lot of them are so interesting. One of them being that they go on these things called, ‘dates’.”

No.2 looks at him oddly. Mouthing out the word to himself a few times. “What kind of word is _that_?”

He hums a bit before answering. “It’s a term humans use for when they’re in a close relationship with another human. They spend time together and do things.”

“Do things?” No.2’s brows knit together even more. “So… does that mean what we’re doing now counts as a date?”

The fact he seems so confused and genuinely curious about this is cute. It’s always nice to see this side of No.2 with how serious he tends to be. “Yes and no, but it depends on what the two in the relationship want. Maybe they want to relax like what we’re doing now, or go somewhere else together.”

There’s a bout of silence between them both before No.2 turns on his side to face him again. “What if we went on a date after the war ends?”

He tries to hold back his snort. “The war isn’t going to end anytime soon, Nigou.”

“ _Pretend then_.” He quickly says while reaching for his hand. “Pretend it does and the two of us can do that. Where would you like me to take you?”

No.2 is so serious and engrossed about this, but they are pretending so it wouldn’t hurt to indulge. Not to mention thinking about these kinds of things with him is fun.

“Did you know humans have a place where you can purchase books? Bookstores are what they’re called, and I think… no, I _know_ I would enjoy going to a place like that. They have practically any kind of book you could ever want! The possibilities are _endless_ and there would be _so_ much reading material!” His mouth parts open in awe as his gaze lifts to the ceiling. “And there’s another place where you don’t buy the books but you can read them at this sort of joint establishment. It’s like a library of sorts but it’s much smaller because the building is used as a thing called a, ‘café’. They serve all kinds of drinks inside, but they’re mostly known for serving coffee!”

“…Coffee?”

He nods. “It’s a type of hot or even sometimes cold beverage humans would drink. It can be sweet and creamy, or it can be sharp and bitter!”

“I’m not sure if I want to drink something bitter.” No.2 murmurs out.

“I think it would be fun to try new things.” No.9 muses aloud. “Whatever they offer, I’d like to taste as _many_ as I can.”

The other android blinks all of a sudden as his cheeks redden. “T-Then so would I!”

No.9 can’t help but laugh. “You don’t have to try it if you don’t like the sound of it, but I guess pouring hot water over seeds sounds… not too appetizing.”

“We’re androids, Kyuugou. Technically we don’t need to drink things like that.”

“But like you said, we’re pretending, remember?”

No.2 looks away with a sigh as he closes his eyes. “Then, I guess if we were human and these bookstores and cafés where they serve unappetizing beverages existed, I’d take you there as _many_ times as you want.”

“ _Really?”_ When No.2 cracks an eye open with a smile, No.9 grins. “They also sell food in those cafés too. Maybe you’d enjoy that more?”

“We technically don’t need to eat either.”

No.9 taps a finger on his cheek. “Hmm I’m pretty sure I caught you staring at a tree with an apple on it one time during one of our missions…”

This time both his eyes snapped open before he looks at him surprise. “I-I was curious and--”

An impish glint flashes in his eyes and he can’t help but smirk at the fact No.2 is trying to hide his with his collar. “You tasted _really_ sweet when I came to visit you later on that day, Nigou.”

“For you to say I tease you a lot, you seem to enjoy doing it to me even more.”

“I like the reaction.” He casually answers as the other scoffs. Shifting closer to rest his head on his shoulder he sighs. “But it would be nice to do those things with you if those places I mentioned still existed.”

“Kyuugou,” No.2 softly begins. “There still has to be something else you want besides me buying you books and weird drinks. Is there somewhere else you want to go?”

No.9’s eyes close as he ponders on the question all the while humming. “It’s hard to choose with so many places I would love to visit. We see _so_ many places when we touch down here, right? It would be nice to see the scenery that isn’t too scarred by the war. Like… the beach for example! When the light catches on the water, it looks like a sparkling jewel! So, reading a book you bought for me while sitting down in the sands would be nice.

“The beach...” No.2 muses aloud before nodding. “I’ll take you there then.”

“What about you, Nigou? I’m the one suggesting things, but I haven’t heard about what you want to do.”

No.2 glances at him before shaking his head. “Being in your company is more than enough.”

“As nice as that is to hear, we’re supposed to be pretending all the same. It’s not a one way street for you to be taking care of me all the time and doing what I want. Where would you want me to take you? Or something you would like for me to get you?”

There’s a look in No.2’s face as he stares at the celling. It isn’t unreadable, but it looks a bit distant. “It has nothing to do with a one way street. I… genuinely don’t know where to begin thinking of place I would like to see or a physical object to have.” As he turns his head in his direction, he gives his hand a squeeze. “But I do know I feel more than content being with you, that it makes any other possible thing pale in comparison as long as I’m by your side.”

He doesn’t feel embarrassed by his words by any means, but they surprise him in such a way he doesn’t know how to react let alone respond. No.2 said all of that so sincerely it made him forget how to breathe. In fact, he was holding in breath not even aware of the fact he did that.

“Nighou,” No.9 breathes out in awe. “That’s…”

“Too much?” The smile on the other android’s face is nothing short of apologetic. “I ruined another moment, didn’t I?”

Ruined it? He didn’t ruin a single thing! But that is always like No.2 to say or do things that just make him react like he just did.

“You didn’t. I’m happy you shared that with me. But, next time we get some free time together, we’re looking through the server to find something that interests you.” As soon as No.2 parts his mouth, he returns it with a stern face that’s forced and already causing the other to snicker and tempting him to break character. “And I’m not taking ‘no’ for an answer.”

“Well, saying ‘no’ to you is hard to do, and I don’t want to upset you.” He grins but nods all the same. “I’ll look forward to it.”

No.9’s gaze lifts to the ceiling as he stays quiet. He can’t help but wonder if… if what he’s about to ask is too much.

“If… if there was no war and neither one of us had to pick up a sword, would you do those things I mentioned to you with me? Those places would still have to exist of course, but you taking me there so we can enjoy the drinks and foods they had? Oh, and you buying me books where I can put them on a shelf inside of a little house. Not too big of a house though because we wouldn’t really need the space, but somewhere that has a nice view?” His chest begins to tighten the more and more he thinks about it. “So I can watch it fill up more and more until it’s full? You would get on me for taking up so much space with them no doubt, but I… I…”

It would be nice to stop fighting and for everyone to stop getting hurt and dying all the time. Live in peace… so that everything can be okay and everyone can live with no worries. So, him and No.2 can be together and keep being in the other’s company forever, and not be worried sick about the other’s safety every day. To wake up and see his face, be in his arms, hold him close, run his fingers through his hair, take care of him, and…

The corners of his eyes sting and before he ponders why, No.2 reaches his hand towards his face and strokes his skin that feels wet all of a sudden.

“What are you crying for?”

No.2’s voice is so soft and filled with concern when he says it, it seems to make his body react as more tears stream down his cheeks as he wipes them away. “I…I don’t know, but I don’t feel sad --” The rest of what he wants to say stops, when No.2 pulls him into a hug all of a sudden. “N-Nighou?”

“Everything you said before, I wish… I could live that kind of life with you, Kyuugou. I want that more than _anything_.”

As his arms wrap around his waist to return the gesture, No.9 sighs as he leans his head against his shoulder. As enjoyable as it is as well being relieved he would want something that any person would consider to be silly for an android to want, he feels awful for ruining their time together like this.

“I’m… sorry. Looks like I’m the one who made things sad just now, huh?”

“You don’t need to apologize. You’re only expressing how you feel.” Pulling away, No.2 smiles as he reaches out to wipe away the remaining wetness on his cheeks. “I’m glad you feel that way, and I’m relieved you want that with me.”

“Of course I want that with you.” He turns his head enough so that he presses his mouth against the bandages on his wrist. “But being with you already makes me so _incredibly_ happy, I don’t know how much more I can express it. It feels as if there isn’t enough I can ever say or even do.”

“You really do spoil me.” No.2 murmurs out. “But I like that you do.”

“You spoil me too. And there’s nothing wrong with us mutually spoiling the other, right? It proves how much we care. In fact,” No.9 happily announces while raising himself up into a sitting position and patting his lap with a grin. “I’m going to do that right now. Rest your head here please.”

The other android seems to perk up in an instant, and moves to rest his head on his lap while closing his eyes. Whenever No.2 relaxes, he feels the same. Even now with how he strokes his fingers though his soft hair, No.2 is practically basking in the attention and soaking it up. He remembers reading up on the server once about how No.2 reminds him of an animal humans would adopt as a ‘pet’ called a ‘cat’. Lightly brushing against the shell of his ear, his lips twitch but when scratching the space behind it, No.2 shifts his head wanting him to continue which he happily obliges. Eventually, his fingers stop at his braid, and his other hand joins in to unravel it loose.

“What are you doing?”

It’s the first thing he said in a while, and No.2 still has his eyes closed as well as making no move to budge an inch. No.9 can’t help but hum as he begins to twist the three locks of hair together again.

“What do you think I’m doing?”

HIs coy reply is met with a snort. “I think you’re messing with my braid that you seem to have fixation on.”

Despite him saying that, No.9 doesn’t answer right away. Instead he unloosens the braid he made before raking his fingers through it. Starting over again, his brows knit together as he focuses.

“It’s not a fixation.”

“Then why do you mess with it so much when we’re alone?”

“I hardly ever see anyone with one of these, so I’m curious.”

“From a braid?” He asks in disbelief.  “Maybe you should be a Scanner type then.”

As if that’s even fair of No.2 to even say with how curious he is when asking him so many questions. But being an S Type would be… _interesting_. He can say that much. No.21 carries out his so job well, but there is so much responsibility to shoulder with devising strategies and pinpointing the enemy’s location. If by some chance he messed up or performed an action one second too late, then what? No.21 even expressed himself as much it can be stressful at times.

“I don’t think I’m suited for it.” Stroking his hair, he smiles. “What if you had my designation?”

“As a Healer?” When he nods, No.2’ gaze lifts to the ceiling before it rests on him again. “I wouldn’t mind it. It would be nice to heal others.” As he says that, No.2 brings his hands into view and stares at them. “Use my hands for another reason besides fighting.”

He never did like that look in No.2’ eyes where he can never pinpoint _what’s_ currently going through his mind whenever he gets this way.

“But you also protect others, Nigou.” After softly sharing that, No.9 reaches for one of his hands and cradles it between his palms. “These hands that use a sword to cut through machines are so incredibly _gentle_ with me.”

“Kyuugou, I… I _never_ want to hurt you with them, but sometimes I can’t help but imagine what it would be like to focus more on bringing comfort to others. There’s enough pain out there in this world. What you do is a good thing and sometimes I can’t help but feel…”

“Yes?” No.9 presses on. When No.2’s brows knit together, he frowns. “You can tell me.”

“It’s…. wrong to say.”

“I’d rather be the judge of that myself if you’re willing to share what could possibly be so wrong about it.”

No.2 shakes his head and smiles. “Maybe another time, Kyuugou.”

Except what he did just now was forced and doesn’t even reach his eyes.

“What if we don’t have another time?”

The other android winces in the _same_ exact way he did when he came back from whatever he was doing during the war story session. No.9 doesn’t know what to say, and can only watch as No.2 raises himself up so that he’s sitting and staring ahead with that look in his eyes. That look where he’s in a place he can’t reach him no matter _how_ much he wants to.

It… hurts a bit. It always does.

No.9 finds himself staring on ahead as well as if there was a way to possibly follow wherever he went. His fingers press into the bed and if he wanted to, he could easily place his hand over No.2’s.

“I want you to know something, No.2.” He hears his breath hitch no doubt due to the face he dropped his nickname and the firm tone he adopted. “You don’t have to tell me anything if you don’t want to, but when you don't, it feels as if you’re shutting me out. You may not realize it or maybe you do already, but it kind of hurts when you have that look on your face where you don’t want anyone to follow whatever world you go into.”

The mattress creaks and in the corner of his vision, he can see that No.2 tore his eyes away from the wall to stare at him. “I don’t mean--”

“The last thing I want is for the most precious person I care about to think he has to suffer all alone. I’m _always_ with you.” No.9 turns his head, seeing the other’s startled expression which he returns with a small smile. “So, please don’t forget that, okay?”

They stare at the other in silence and the startled look in No.2’s eyes slowly fades away only to be replaced with that empty one again.

“No.9, could you ever bring yourself to hate me one day?”

There were many things he expected No.2 to say but that question was not one of them. His eyes widen the longer he stares at him. “Hate you? Why would… why would I ever want to hate--”

“It’s only a question and I’m curious to know.”

As curious as No.2 is to know his opinions on things, this is… _grim_. Or maybe, he’s in no position to say that with what he told him earlier. The atmosphere and tension in this room is becoming so thick and heavy, his throat feels dry.

“No, I could _never_ bring myself to hate you. Why would you ask me something like that?”

No.2 looks away as his head lowers and his bangs obscure his face. He knows he heard his question so he doesn’t understand why he won’t respond to it. It’s too quiet again but before he parts his mouth to break the silence, there’s a pressure on his chest that is strong enough to easily force him on his back, and it’s followed by No.2’s leg swinging over his waist as he straddles him while his hands wrap around his throat. It all happened so quickly in a blink of an eye, he questions how No.2 is even capable of it. The pressure around his neck isn’t tight by any means, but the presence is there and difficult to ignore. But it doesn’t scare him, even if their current position doesn’t bother him like it logically should, it… it doesn’t scare him. Instead, he’s more focused on _why_ No.2’s expression-- despite remaining to appear so devoid of emotion, now seems _frigid_.

“If for whatever reason one day, I’m not in the right state of mind, would you kill me?”

If he thought his last question was grim, it paled in comparison to this now morbid one.

“I… I don’t understand…” No.9 slowly begins. “What do you mean not in the right state of mind? As if you were infected with a logic virus?”

No.2’s eyes narrow, and they’re so sharp, he swallows. “Since we’re hypothetically talking right now and if you want to say that, then yes.”

But even in a hypothetical sense, there’s no way a scenario like that is even possible due to one major factor. Even No.2 has to be aware of that. “But you’re a D Type. As a Defender, you told me yourself you have a much higher resistance to viruses and--”

“That’s why I said hypothetically.” No.2’s body tenses all of a sudden as he briefly bites down on his lip. “Just pretend.”

“I…” No.9 slowly begins. “I would do _whatever_ I can to help you. _Save you_.” He stresses the last two words out as much as he possibly can and notices how No.2’s shoulders begin to tremble. “If you died… I don’t want to think about the aftermath of it… or what I would even do.” Slowly reaching for the other android’s wrists he gently wraps his fingers around them. “If you went away forever… I feel as if… a part of me would do the same.”

No.2’s breath hitches as holds his gaze. As if he’s surprised by all of what he says. He doesn’t understand why considering it’s the honest truth. Doesn’t he believe him?

“So naïve.” No.2 murmurs out as lips curve into a smile. “But your kindness is something I’m happy for even if you shouldn’t waste it on someone like me.” Before he’s about to retort he shouldn’t feel that way, the soft look on his face vanishes. “What about right now? What if I just tightened my hands… until you couldn’t breathe anymore? Wouldn’t you be scared about what would happen next? Wouldn’t you hate the person you cherish so much betraying your trust and killing you?”

“ _No_.” His answer is quick and firm. “Because _I_ know you wouldn’t hurt me. No.2, whatever it is you’re trying to say, my feelings won’t change--”

No.2’s laugh is soft as he shakes his head. “ _Idiot_. Why… are you _always_ so… stubborn to stay true to how you feel? So _honest_ with me?” When he slowly unwraps his hands around his throat, they’re placed on either side of his head. “But… I _knew_ you would say _all_ of that, and I’m relieved that you did. Even if… a part of me deep down wishes… wishes you would say you hate me and never want to be around me anymore.”

“No.2…”

“ _No.9_ , being with you makes me feel as if I can be good person, but at the same time, it reminds me even more how _pure_ you are. So many times I think about how I feel you waste your kindness on someone like me. Someone who isn’t deserving of _any_ of it.”

“But you _are_ deserving of it. Do you really think how I feel about you isn’t genuine?”

His gaze travels elsewhere as his eye narrow. “I didn’t say that.”

Frustration slowly begins to rise inside of him. He doesn’t even understand what triggered this sudden behavior from No.2 all of a sudden. “Then what _are_ you saying? I-I’m not sure… and honestly, you’re scaring me as if--”

As if he wants to just flat out leave or… _end_ things with him.

“Do…” His throat feels dry as he swallows. “Do you _want_ this to stop between us--”

“ _No_.” No.2 cuts in. “I _never_ want it to. I want it to keep going, but I…” His voice begins to trail as he shakes his head and covers his face with his hand. “ _I’m sorry_. I’m a horrible person for upsetting you so much tonight. So horrible and selfish…”

This entire time they’ve been conversing with one another and even before that, No.2 is clearly hurting over something. He has no idea on what the source of it could be, but if he can help relieve any of the stress linked to it, he will. If he even thinks for some silly reason he’ll leave, he will do everything he can to reassure him otherwise.

It was with that firm resolve in mind, No.9 grabs No.2’s arm and his shoulder to tug him down with enough force their mouths meet. His lips feel so stiff and an aching pang hits him from within as he desperately slides his own against his. Worry  begins to settles in but No.2 finally moves as if some invisible string snapped, and returns his kiss that matched his own frenzy and to a degree much more beyond that. It’s almost raw in a sense the more they continue and use their hands to grasp at each other’s bodies, so they can be as close as they possibly can. Even when they broke contact and gasped for air soon after, their names are shared against their lips in hushed whispers only to be silenced when they meet again and again.

When they do stop to take in the much needed air, they look into the other’s half lidded eyes. No.2’s mouth parts as his brows knit together, and he wants to ask him if something is wrong until the crease begins to relax as he moves to rest his forehead against his.

“Thank you. Thank you for _everything_ , No.9.”

Thank him for what exactly? He doesn’t understand, and he wants to ask why but, No.2 bows his head and brushes his lips against his so softly over and over again with each time being punctuated with a lingering pause. His body shivers every time and proceeds to tremble when No.2 settles himself between his legs and begins to slowly rock against him. They both take in a sharp intake of air, but his voice catches in his throat and he needs to hold on to _something_ at the blissful sensation he’s currently feeling. No.2’s name leaves his mouth in a whisper and a plea all at once and the other android takes no time taking their hands and lacing them together as he presses against him much more firmly, much faster to the point they gasp as tremors travel down their spines and reach their circuits.

Their eyes lock again and No.9 has to force himself to breathe. How No.2 is looking at him now compared to before is so _loving_. And yet so…

So incredibly _sad_.

Freeing one of his hands, No.9 reaches out to stroke his face, and No.2 leans into his touch with a sigh before turning his head to press his lips against his palm. It’s a light touch, but the aftermath of it feels _searing_ against his skin. Dragging his hand to the back of No.2’s neck, he pulls him closer until their lips meet again and parts them open to deepen it and they’re back to before where they can’t get enough of the other. They reach for the buttons on their coats, unfastening them one by one in desperation, and only pulling back or shifting away enough while keeping their kiss intact so that they can push the material away from their bare shoulders. There’s a light pressure against his skin, courtesy of No.2’s hand as it slowly drags and rests where his black box is located.

“It’s humming so fast.” He murmurs against his mouth before dragging his lips to his neck.

“Because… because of you.” The reply is breathed out as he reaches to card his fingers through his hair, but the lower and lower he gets, the more his body begins to squirm at the tingling aftermaths of every one of his feather light touches. “Because of… you…”

“Because of… me.”

No.2’s words are a murmur against his skin that sound as if he’s confirming something for himself. He wonders why but once feeling the rapid flutter of his lashes followed by wetness, No.9 takes no time propping himself up. The other android’s head is bowed, and once reaching and forcing him to look at him properly, No.2 is already wiping his face with the back of his hand.

“I-I’m sorry… I did it again--”

“Sorry for what? You told me I should express how I feel and you should too.” The pads of his thumbs stroke his skin with a smile. “You _never_ have to hold _anything_ back with me.”

The wide eyed look No.2 had from before forms on his face before it softens. “I wonder… if I should call you an idiot more. A naïve yet honest idiot that means _so_ much to me.” Taking one of his hands, he places it over his chest. “Even now when I’m with you, my body has a mind of its own. Only you have that effect on me, No.9.”

His gaze lowers as he splays his fingers against his skin. The heat emitting from No.2’s black box paired with the fast humming, felt pleasant to touch. And… the fact he makes him feel this way, brings this sense of pride that wells inside his chest.

“Is it okay if I stay here with you?” No.2 softly asks as he lowers his head in a way that it reminds him of the day he asked him if it was okay to hold his hand for the very first time. “I want to wake up and have your face be the first thing I see.”

No.9 inches closer before pulling him into a hug and wrapping his arms around his shoulders. He hears the other android’s breath hitch, and his first response to it was laughing against his hair and following it up with a lingering kiss.

“I’d like that. I’d like that a lot.”

No.2’s body seems to deflate as he exhales before wrapping his arms around his waist and pressing his face against his shoulder. “I’m glad that I met you, No.9.” His hold on him tightens as he presses his lips against his skin. “And I _promise_ I’ll protect you until the day I’m not here anymore.”

It’s another bold declaration from No.2. It’s still grim, but it’s genuine. A solid oath. He said something similar to him much earlier on before they even confessed how they truly felt about each other, but this one felt so much different.

“Even though I’m not a fighter, I’ll do _everything_ I can to protect you too. So that day you think you won’t be here anymore, will _never_ come.”

No.2 lets him go and draws back as soon the words leave his mouth, and No.9 wonders why he broke contact with him, but his worries are laid to rest when No.2 grabs his face with both hands and kisses him with enough force, his back hits the mattress. It seems desperate yet again as No.2 clutches on to him, but when he finally kisses him back after the initial surprise, it seems to spur him to press even closer to him. No.2’s hands slide to his waist before they rest there, holding him steady as he lines their hips together and presses into him again and again before it evolves into a grind. It’s slow yet steady burn that intensified to a point where their hands begin to roam everywhere on each other’s bodies. Even when they were forced to break away due to needing air, they took that time to whisper out the other’s name before punctuating it with chaste kisses and lingering gazes. 

His systems feel as if they’re in a constant whirring cycle of bliss, comfort, and safety. Just like they always do when he’s around No.2. How he wants it to _always_ be. And the fact he knows it’s mutual made _all_ of those feelings increase tenfold.

No.2 breaks their kiss and smiles only to lean back in to brush his lips against his before moving to pepper his face with one feather light brush after the next. It made his entire body flare up despite the fact he embraces every bit of the affection he’s being showered with a smile.

A thank you. His silent way of saying those two simple words to his previous ones. And when No.9 tugs on the sleeve of No.2’s coat that he never properly removed, his eyes lock on to his. Another silent cue between them both as they pull away and slowly remove each other’s coats.

“No.9, do you mind if I show you how much you mean to me?”

“But you already do--”

“ _Physically_. Let me show you how much I care about you that I can’t say in words. As _many_ times as I can right now.”

“On one condition.” Despite the fact No.2 waits for him to continue, the look on his face alone shows that he _knows_ what he’s about to say, made his smile grow even more. “As long as you let me show you how much I care about you too.”

“Mutual exchange then.” No.2 places his hands over his as he leans towards him again. “You and me.”

And he can’t but take those very hands and lace their fingers together while drawing closer to the point their foreheads touch. “Me and you.”

“ _Together_.” They breathe out before their lips meet again.

And just for that moment and a few more to come that night, they can pretend they are the only ones who exist in the tiny little world that only _they_ can escape to and breathe together.

**Author's Note:**

> This initially was supposed to be pure fluff when I got the idea for it, but the longer I worked on it, that changed. A lot.


End file.
